I've made a solemn promise to this blog that I'll make an entry of some sort at least a few times a week.
I will. Honest.
I've been lacking motivation, feeling that I've nothing to share with the world. The shaggy black dog has been walking on my heels, giving a toothy nip every so often. A nip that says "you're pretty crap as a person aren't you? What have you got to offer society now then?"
Reader, if you'redepressive you'll understand what I mean. If you don't understand - you're one very bloody lucky person! Be thankful for that.
At the risk of you finding my blog a good sleep aid*, I'd like to think aloud about how fibro found me.
I suppose most people when first diagnosed with fibromyalgia search about for a possible cause. It seems so strange to be a "normal", fairly active, working body and the next finding even a touch in certain body spots can cause you to buckle in pain and an ouch to escape your lips. Reading Web M.D, the words (quote) "There have been some studies that link fibromyalgia to sudden trauma to the brain and spinal cord" (unquote) were like a lightbulb moment; I wonder if my car incident 4 years ago triggered this fibro of mine?
At the time it seemed such a minor incident. An old man reversing his car down the street, seemingly trying to reverse into a parking space but instead drove bang into my little Lucy Toyota. Although I'd tried to get his attention by peeping my horn, flashing my lights, sticking my head out of the window to shout, the old chap put his foot down a bit harder on the gas. The resulting kiss of cars shot Lucy backwards with a kangaroo jump, it didn't really feel like a big deal but it caused me a bad whiplash injury and gave my already damaged spine something else to moan about.
A visit to the doctor and some days on strong painkillers followed and to be honest I thought nothing more of it. Well I was too busy seething about my poor little Lucy being damaged! Her front end all buckled and crumpled. Up until then I was renown for having a really high pain threshold; once I nearly chopped my index finger off with parrot loppers whilst trimming up the bay tree. Don't bother asking how on earth my finger got in the way, I've no idea. I remember seeing the glisten of bone beneath the spurting blood and thinking the loppers were sharper than I thought. It stung a bit, made my teeth grind a bit but certainly didn't send me crying with pain, flinching and ouching. See what I mean? I could stand a fair amount of pain.
Within a few months of the car incident I was ouching and wincing at the slightest touch. I hurt all over. And how strange! The pains seemed to travel along my body. What the heck was going on here then! It took another year and a serious bout of shingles before I was told it seemed I had a thing called fibromyalgia. I thought it was something to do with fibroids and was wondering if I would end up having a hysterectomy! Lol, so naive I am at times.
So I reckon I'm going to stick my neck out, now there's a pun!, and hazard a guess that it was my car incident that triggered it all. If only I could go back in time and avoid it happening. I'd still be the "normal", fairly active old Crone.
And I wouldn't be writing this.
What do you think triggered your fibro/ M.E/ lupus, or other such illness? Please don't be shy, if you'd like to share then use the comment boxes. I'm really interested.
*and if it sends you to sleep that's all well and good. At least it's done something worthwhile.
Note: This was originally intended for my Farcebook but before I pressed 'post', I thought again. Even though I want to invite other fibro/lupus/ M.E sufferers to tell about what they think triggered their illness ( I'd love it if you would use the comment boxes), I'm aware that there's family and friends who don't like to see me talking about it on Farcebook. They feel that in talking about it, I'm dwelling on it, making myself worse. I know that's not the case but to keep the peace I decided to put it on here instead. We all need to think aloud on occasion and get things off the chest!